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Come Now; Let Us Reason Together
Last month I wrote about “The Blessing in Criticism”. In that article I shared how criticism is something that is done to us and is a blessing for us. Today, as the title states, I am going to talk about stubbornness. Stubbornness is a character trait that someone could possess and is self-destructive. Stubbornness is defined as unreasonably and obstructively determined to persevere or prevail; hard to remove: difficult to remove or deal with. This is not to be confused with persistence. Persistence is defined as to continuing despite problems or difficulties: tenaciously. The key difference between the two is that stubbornness is unreasonable.
Before I get into any details, let me refer to a biblical scripture that can give us some insight. It is found in the book of Numbers chapter 22, and is one of the Bibles more strange passages (you’ll see). It reads,
“But God's anger was kindled [with Balaam] because he went, and the angel of the Lord took his stand in the way as his adversary. Now he [Balaam] was riding on the donkey, and his two servants were with him. And the donkey saw the angel of the Lord standing in the road, with a drawn sword in his hand. And the donkey turned aside out of the road and went into the field. And Balaam struck the donkey, to turn her into the road. Then the angel of the Lord stood in a narrow path between the vineyards, with a wall on either side. And when the donkey saw the angel of the Lord, she pushed against the wall and pressed Balaam's foot against the wall. So he struck her again. Then the angel of the Lord went ahead and stood in a narrow place, where there was no way to turn either to the right or to the left. When the donkey saw the angel of the Lord, she lay down under Balaam. And Balaam's anger was kindled, and he struck the donkey with his staff. Then the Lord opened the mouth of the donkey, and she said to Balaam, “What have I done to you, that you have struck me these three times?” And Balaam said to the donkey, “Because you have made a fool of me. I wish I had a sword in my hand, for then I would kill you.” And the donkey said to Balaam, “Am I not your donkey, on which you have ridden all your life long to this day? Is it my habit to treat you this way?” And he [Balaam] said, “No.”” (Numbers 22:22-30 ESV).
A talking donkey; I told you it was strange. Let’s see how these passages can help us understand the self-destructive of stubbornness.
There are four aspects of stubbornness. The first is Blindness. Balaam could not see the angel of the Lord. Stubbornness produces a spiritual blindness. You can’t see the true nature of things because you are so caught up in your own self-interest.
Secondly, stubbornness produces a victim mentality. Balaam was convinced that his donkey was trying to make a fool of him, and that he could in no way be part of his own problem. The stubborn person if convinced in his own mind that other people are the cause of their pain or lack of success.
Thirdly, stubbornness produces paranoia. Paranoia is defined as distrust extreme and unreasonable suspicion of other people and their motives involving systematized delusion, usually of persecution. Although not revealed in the above passages, stubborn people always think everyone is out to get them, talking about them, trying to take what they have.
Finally, there is the aspect of Supernatural Intervention. Nothing short of God Himself can break through to the person who is stubborn. The stubborn person is usually only broken by severe pain, utter failure, or emotional collapse.
Saul of Tarsus was stubborn until Christ Jesus intervened on the road to Damascus recorded in Acts 9. The Apostle Peter was stubborn about preaching to the Gentiles until Christ Jesus appeared to him in a vision from the rooftop, recorded in Acts 10. The Bible records others who God did not intervene to save but authorized their self-destruction. Most notable are Saul, Israel’s first King (1st Samuel 15), and Queen Jezebel wife of King Ahab (2nd Kings 9). Both sought to kill all their critics and refused to heed numerous warnings.
For those of us who have to live or work with a stubborn person, let me give you some advice. Pray and get out of the way! No amount of discussion, reasoning, appeasement, or arguing will change the stubborn person. The stubborn person must be allowed to run his or her course to the end and if God does not intervene they will certainly self destruct.
I conclude, with the word of the Lord, given through a former stubborn man recorded in Romans chapter 12. “For I say, through the grace given to me, to everyone who is among you, not to think of himself more highly than he ought to think, but to think soberly, as God has dealt to each one a measure of faith.”
Don’t self-destruct in your own stubbornness.
The Holy Bible, English Standard Version (ESV), Copyright 2000, 2001 by Crossway Bibles
The Self-Destruction of Stubbornness